Script for
The Gum

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Nightclub
Jerry [unwrapping a piece of gum] I think gum is, is one of the weirdest human inventions. [pops gum in his mouth] It's not a liquid, 's not a solid, 's not a food. What is it? It isn't really anything, you know. I mean, it's like a stationary bike for your jaw. Like, remember when you were in school, and teachers would get all riled up if they caught you with gum? And when you were a kid, you'd think 'What is the big deal?' But, as an adult, I can understand it, because when you're chewing gum, you don't look like you're too thrilled with anything anyone has to say. [as sarcastic teen] 'Oh, World War Two. That was an important historical event? Yeah, I'm sure.' 'They landed a man on the moon, nineteen sixty-nine? Yeah, right. Yeah, I buy that, teach.'

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