Bubba Knows Everybody
Bubba and his boss were talking when the boss realized that he had an appointment with the CEO.
Boss: Sorry Bubba but I've got to go see the CEO.
Bubba: Really? Say hi for me.
Boss: What? You don't know the CEO.
Bubba: Sure I do. I know everybody.
Boss: You don't know everybody, Bubba.
Bubba: Yes I do. Test me. Name anybody and I know them.
Boss (thinks): I bet you don't know Arnold Schwarzenegger.
Bubba: Sure I know Arnold. We went to school together.
Boss: I don't believe you. Prove it.
They fly to California. They approach Arnold's house and knock.
Arnold: Hello? Oh, hello, Bubba. How have you been?
Bubba: I've been fine.
They sit and talk for half an hour, then leave.
Bubba: See Boss, I do know everybody.
Boss: That was just luck. You can't know everybody.
Bubba: Yes I can. Try me again. Name anybody.
Boss: OK, how about the President, George Bush?
Bubba: I know him. We were in Boy Scouts together.
Boss: I don't believe you. Prove it.
They fly to D.C. and push their way to the front of a press conference and George notices them. He waves.
Bush: Hi, Bubba. How have you been all these years?
Bubba: Hello, George. I'm fine.
They sit and talk for half an hour, then leave.
Bubba: See Boss, I do know everybody.
Boss: That was coincidence. You CAN'T know everybody.
Bubba: Sure I can. Try again. Think of someone world renowned.
Boss: I got it. You don't know the Pope.
Bubba: Yes I do. Why he baptized me.
Boss: There is no way you know the Pope.
They fly to Vatican City and go to the Mass. They try to push their way to the front but can't.
Bubba: I'll go ahead and give you a sign that I know the Pope.
Boss: That's fine.
Bubba goes ahead and vanishes in the crowd, which comes to a roar as the Pope walks out, Bubba at his side.
Bubba returns after Mass to find his Boss passed out.
Bubba: Hey, Boss. Was it too much for you that I knew the Pope?
Boss: No. What really got me was when you walked out and the man next to me said "Who is that man with Bubba?"